Lyle Seaman

Time Enough to Cry

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Does anybody really care about time?

Angela A. cares. "TGI(T|F)" she announces. "The days just run together!"

Up Up Down Down Left Right Left...

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...Right B A. Right? Every so often, someone sends us a submission with a hidden agenda. Of course we get the usual solicitations for marriageable exotic beauties and offers to trade linkspam locations. But then there are the really interesting ones. Maybe they're legitimate, maybe they're photoshopped or otherwise faked, and maybe they're an attempt to bypass someone's ban on political propaganda or quack science. In any case, there isn't any of that here this week, but we're saving them up and maybe we'll feature a future issue of spot the fraud for you.

First up is dog lover George with a hysterical spam-blocking email address, sharing a help message that must have been crafted by Catbert himself. "My sixty seconds of glory awaits!" he howls, but then whimpers "I will be real disappointed if the agent isn't [Gone in Sixty Seconds headliner] Nicolas Cage."

Everything Old is New Again

by in Error'd on

Whenever there's a major change in the world, it always takes application developers a little time to adjust. Remember when the US government thought it would be a great idea to mess around with their Daylight Saving Time schedule with only two years warning? (I'm guessing nobody remembers the fiddling done by earlier administrations because they were too young to care, or not born yet.) Two years warning probably seemed like plenty to non-technical legislators, not thinking about all the software that was in place with built-in calendars. Well, someone has apparently decided to one-up a measly time change, by inventing something called a New YEAR. This resets the entire calendar, and it must be a novel practice because surely websites wouldn't break due to some routine event that has been happening for at least a dozen years or more, right? Right?

Aspiring Poké trainer Valts S. began a long long time ago far far away.


by in Error'd on

At the end of the year, it's customary to reflect on the past and imagine a future. Here at Error'd, reflecting on the past is natural, but all we can do about the future is hope. So to close out the longest 2020, here are a handful of little muffed missives.

Occasional contributor Peter diagnoses a counting error. "Looks like the web server had a thing or two to add to the discussion."

Some Like It Hotter

by in Error'd on

Fast approaching the end of the Gregorian calendar, things start to happen all at once, just to get them over with. According to Daniel D. "It's November 21 and Facebook can't decide which tomorrow comes first."



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Alas, I have only the following five submissions to share, as my controversy generator is on the Fritz today.

Ex post autumnal Adam R. warmly reflects "I'm not quite sure how the math works out here, but I'm apparently a one-percenter in the home energy savings department."

Some Like It Hot

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Admittedly, this holiday season is culturally dominated by the Anglo-American tradition of a wintertime Christmas. Currier & Ives notwithstanding, most of the various holidays obviously originated in some summer event, or else a harvest one. For these hot holidays, our mate Peter starts things off with a very warm greeting from down under. Following that are a few of my favorite stocking stuffers, until Peter's antipodal ally Michael closes everything out with an appeal to warm the heart but not blister the sole.

Aussie Peter G. mutters weakly "I think this warning is bit superfluous (for the non-metric, that's 550 degrees F)."

The Other Washington

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This week, anonymous Franz starts us off with a catch-22. "I opened MS Word (first time after reboot) and a dialog box opens that tells me to close a dialog box. This was the only open dialog box... I guess even software makes excuses to be lazy on Fridays."